So, I met this guy on OkCupid. His profile was like a well-written rom-com script: "I love dogs, brunch, and spontaneous road trips!" Classic. We start messaging, and within hours, it felt like we had an inside joke about only eating pizza in dimensions where pineapple was illegal. We decided to meet up at a trendy coffee shop — you know, the kind where they put your drink name in a fancy font on the side of a mason jar. I walk in, and there he is, looking as lost as a tourist in Times Square. “Hey!” he said, awkwardly holding a cup of black coffee like it was a grenade. We chat, the banter is flowing, and I think, “Wow, this is it!” But then, as he launched into an elaborate plan for a pineapple-on-pizza protest, I noticed his eyes had a distant glaze of someone who had just spotted a New York pigeon contemplating his life choices. Fast forward to three days later: I text him, “Hey, how’s your week going?” He responds two days later with a simple, “Busy.” I respond, “Cool! Hope you’re not too busy to fight for pizza liberty!” And poof! He disappears faster than a slice at a Brooklyn pizzeria on a Friday night. Now, I’m left with the memories of a coffee meeting that bloomed like a flush of spring flowers but wilted faster than I could say “ghost